Your Sexually Addicted Spouse
by Dr. Barbara Steffens
This groundbreaking book first released by New Horizon Press in 2009, has been updated and redesigned. Publication date was June 8, 2021–the first of two titles released by Armin Lear in June to support PTSD Awareness Month. The second was LIVING WITH GRAFT-VERSUS-HOST-DISEASE.
Sexual addiction and compulsive sexual behavior often steal a person’s ability to achieve emotional or sexual intimacy. Both addicts and their partners may suffer in isolation, ashamed and afraid, not knowing where to turn for help. YOUR SEXUALLY ADDICTED SPOUSE shatters that stigma and shame and provides understanding and empathy for the addict and his or her spouse.
Partners of sex addicts, historically thought of as codependent or “co-addicted” have often felt unheard, misunderstood and as a result, were not able to receive the help and support they needed to heal. In her groundbreaking 2005 study, Dr. Steffens found that 70 percent of betrayed individuals experienced significant post-traumatic stress symptoms following the discovery of repeated sexual infidelity and betrayal. The study was the first to show that partners are not codependents but post-traumatic stress victims.
Dr. Steffens explains: “The betrayed spouse seeks what she cannot find: safety in an unsafe situation.”
Co-author Marsha Means’ personal experience provides insights, strategies, and critical steps to recognize, deal with, and heal partners of sexually addicted relationships.
Firsthand accounts and stories reveal the impact of this addiction on survivors’ lives. Chapters end with “On a Personal Note” questions and propose new paths that lead from trauma to empowerment, health, and hope. Useful appendices list health and mental health care providers and clergy. In the book, readers understand that the distress they are experiencing are symptoms of trauma, not co-addiction. This information has changed everything for betrayed partners and is changing the support they now receive. Betrayed partners now have a vision and a hope for healing of their trauma.
